Martin
The master of combustion, the maker of stuff, the scourge of Lower Austria, the one who defeats riffs, the weregnome. G.O.D.s
resident guitarsonist and founding member is a force to be reckoned with. Why else would he keep an emergency battle axe in
his hallway? Martin is clearly the most practical guy in the band, being it hammer, axe or tachyon deflector, which greatly
helps G.O.D. to get anything done. That he is also a photogenic bugger is annoyingly unfair.
Just one very important piece of advice. If you can hear him giggling - then run! Where to does not matter, just run. Also, avoid him at full moon because of CENSORED with CENSORED his CENSORED at CENSORED for CENSORED from CENSORED by CENSORED at all cost CENSORED CENSORED. Oh my, that were two important pieces of advice now, our bad.
There is also a vicious rumour that needs to be dispelled: Martin is not Captain Merchandise's hidden identity. We have definitely seen both of them in the same room. With no coercion involved at all, you can put the axe down now Martin. To all doubters - take a deep look into his eyes. Could such a fiery soul really spend his time on a wooden ship plundering the seven seas?
Just one very important piece of advice. If you can hear him giggling - then run! Where to does not matter, just run. Also, avoid him at full moon because of CENSORED with CENSORED his CENSORED at CENSORED for CENSORED from CENSORED by CENSORED at all cost CENSORED CENSORED. Oh my, that were two important pieces of advice now, our bad.
There is also a vicious rumour that needs to be dispelled: Martin is not Captain Merchandise's hidden identity. We have definitely seen both of them in the same room. With no coercion involved at all, you can put the axe down now Martin. To all doubters - take a deep look into his eyes. Could such a fiery soul really spend his time on a wooden ship plundering the seven seas?
Merchandise!